Accounting 2007-10-15 03:37 PM
漂亮MM想嫁有錢人 金融家的回复令人叫绝
[color=black][url=http://www.westca.com/Forums/viewtopic/printertopic=1/t=134224/start=0/postdays=0/postorder=asc/Forums/index.html][color=black]移民生活论坛[/color][/url] -> [url=http://www.westca.com/Forums/viewtopic/printertopic=1/t=134224/start=0/postdays=0/postorder=asc/Forums/viewforum/f=49.html][color=black]投资理[/color][/url][/color]
#1: [color=black][b]ZT: 漂亮MM想嫁有钱人 金融家的回复令人叫绝[/b] 作者: [b]investboth[/b], [/color][color=black][/color]
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一个年轻漂亮的美国女孩在美国一家大型网上论坛金融版上发表了这样一个问题帖：我怎样才能嫁给
有钱人？
“我下面要说的都是心里话。本人25岁，非常漂亮，是那种让人惊艳的漂亮，谈吐文雅，有品位，想
嫁给年薪 50万美元的人。你也许会说我贪心，但在纽约年薪100万才算是中产，本人的要求其实不
高。
这个版上有没有年薪超过 50万的人？你们都结婚了吗？我想请教各位一个问题——怎样才能嫁
给你们这样的有钱人？我约会过的人中，最有钱的年薪 25万，这似乎是我的上限。要住进纽约中心
公园以西的高尚住宅区，年薪25万远远不够。我是来诚心诚意请教的。有几个具体的问题：一、有钱
的单身汉一般都在哪里消磨时光？ (请列出酒吧、饭店、健身房的名字和详细地址。)二、我应该把
目标定在哪个年龄段？三、为什么有些富豪的妻子看起来相貌平平？我见过有些女孩，长相如同白开
水，毫无吸引人的地方，但她们却能嫁入豪门。而单身酒吧里那些迷死人的[url=http://www.westca.com/Forums/viewtopic/printertopic=1/t=134224/start=0/postdays=0/postorder=asc/Tag/title=%C3%C0%C5%AE.html]美女[/url]却运气不佳。四、你
们怎么决定谁能做妻子，谁只能做女朋友？ (我现在的目标是结婚。)”——波尔斯女士
下面是一个[url=http://www.westca.com/Forums/viewtopic/printertopic=1/t=134224/start=0/postdays=0/postorder=asc/Tag/title=%BB%AA%B6%FB%BD%D6.html]华尔街[/url]金融家的回帖：
“亲爱的波尔斯：我怀着极大的兴趣看完了贵帖，相信不少女士也有跟你类似的疑问。让我以一
个投资专家的身份，对你的处境做一分析。我年薪超过50万，符合你的择偶标准，所以请相信我并不
是在浪费大家的时间。
从生意人的角度来看，跟你结婚是个糟糕的经营决策，道理再明白不过，请听我解释。抛开细枝
末节，你所说的其实是一笔简单的“财”“貌”交易：甲方提供述人的外表，乙万出钱，公平交易，
童叟无欺。但是，这里有个致命的问题，你的美貌会消逝，但我的钱却不会无缘无故减少。事实上，
我的收入很可能会逐年涕增．而你不可能一年比一年漂亮。
因此，从经济学的角度讲，我是增值资产，你是贬值资产，不但贬值，而且是加速贬值!你现在
25，在未来的五年里，你仍可以保持窈窕的身段，俏丽的容貌，虽然每年略有退步。但美貌消逝的速
度会越来越快，如果它是你仅有的资产，十年以后你的价值甚忧。
用华尔街术语说，每笔交易都有一个仓位，跟你交往属于“交易仓位”(tradingl position)，
一旦价值下跌就要立即抛售，而不宜长期持有——也就是你想要的婚姻。听起来很残忍，但对一件会
加速贬值的物资，明智的选择是租赁，而不是购入。年薪能超过50万的人，当然都不是傻瓜，因此我
们只会跟你交往，但不会跟你结婚。所以我劝你不要苦苦寻找嫁给有钱人的秘方。顺便说一句，你倒
可以想办法把自己变成年薪50万的人，这比碰到一个有钱的傻瓜的胜算要大。
希望我的回帖能对你有帮助。如果你对“租赁”感兴趣，请跟我联系。”——罗波．坎贝尔（J
·P·摩根银行多种产业投资顾问）
#2: [color=black][b]Re: ZT: 漂亮MM想嫁有钱人 金融家的回复令人叫绝[/b] 作者: [b]investboth[/b], [/color]
[url=http://www.westca.com/Forums/viewtopic/printertopic=1/t=134224/start=0/postdays=0/postorder=asc/Forums/viewtopic/p=742153.html#742153][img=12,9]http://www.westca.com/Forums/viewtopic/printertopic=1/t=134224/start=0/postdays=0/postorder=asc/modules/Forums/templates/subSilver/images/icon_minipost.gif[/img][/url][color=black]时间: 2007-10-13 20:27[/color]
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25 Year-Old Beauty Seeks Rich Banker
The following exchange took place on Craigslist - the investment banker's [url=http://www.westca.com/Forums/viewtopic/printertopic=1/t=134224/start=0/postdays=0/postorder=asc/Tag/title=RESP.html]RESP[/url]onse is a classic!
Original Post
'What am I doing wrong?
Okay, I’m tired of beating around the bush. I’m a beautiful(spectacularly beautiful) 25 year old girl. I’m articulate and classy.I’m not from New York. I’m looking to get married to a guy who makes atleast half a million a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in mindthat a million a year is middle class in New York City, so I don’tthink I’m overreaching at all.
Are there any guys who make 500K or more on this board ? Any wives ?Could you send me some tips ? I dated a business man who made anaverage of around 200 - 250K. But that’s where I seem to hit aroadblock. $250,000 won’t get me to Central Park West. I know a womanin my yoga class who was married to an investment banker, and lives inTribeca. She’s not as pretty as I am, nor is she a great genius. Sowhat is she doing right ? How do I get to her level ?
Here are my questions specifically:
- Where do you single rich men hang out ? Give me specifics - bars, restaurants, gyms
- What are you looking for in a mate? Be honest guys, you won’t hurt my feelings
- Is there an age range I should be targeting ?
- Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the Upper EastSide so plain? I’ve seen really ‘Plain Jane’ boring types, who havenothing to offer incredibly wealthy guys. Then I’ve seen drop deadgorgeous girls in singles bars in the East Village. What’s the storythere ?
- Lawyers, investment bankers, doctors. How much do those guys really make ? And where do the hedge fund guys hang out ?
- How do you rich guys decide on marriage vs. just a girlfriend ? I am looking for MARRIAGE ONLY.
Please hold your insults - I’m putting myself out there in an honestway. Most beautiful women are superficial - at least I’m being up frontabout it. I wouldn’t be searching for these kind of guys if I wasn’table to match them - in looks, culture, sophistication, and keeping anice hearth and home'.
An Investment Banker's Response:
Dear Pers-431649184:
'I read your posting with great interest and have thought meaningfullyabout your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your predicament.
Firstly, I’m not wasting your time. I qualify as a guy who fits yourbill - that is, I make more than $500K per year. That said, here’s howI see it:
Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is a plain andsimple crappy business deal. Here’s why. Cutting through all the B.S.,what you suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the partyand I bring my money. Fine, simple. But here’s the rub, your looks willfade and my money will likely continue into perpetuity - in fact, it isvery likely that my income will in[url=http://www.westca.com/Forums/viewtopic/printertopic=1/t=134224/start=0/postdays=0/postorder=asc/Tag/title=%BC%D3%C4%C3%B4%F3%B7%BF%B5%D8%B2%FA%D0%AD%BB%E1.html]CREA[/url]se, but it is an absolute certainty that you won’t be getting any more beautiful!
So, in economic terms, you are a depreciating asset. Not only are you adepreciating asset, however, your depreciation accelerates! Let meexplain - you’re 25 now and will likely remain pretty hot for the next5 years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins in earnest. By 35- stick a fork in you!
So, in Wall Street terms, we'd call you a trading position - not a buyand hold…hence the rub…marriage. It doesn’t make good business sense to'buy you' (which is what you’re asking) - so I’d rather lease. In caseyou think I’m being cruel, I would say the following: if my money wereto go away, so would you - so when your beauty fades I need an out too.It’s as simple as that. So the deal that makes sense for me is dating,not marriage.
Separately, I was taught early in my career about efficient markets.So, I wonder why a girl as 'articulate, classy and spectacularlybeautiful' as you has been unable to find your sugar daddy. I find ithard to believe that, if you are as gorgeous as you say you are, your$500K man hasn’t found you - if only for a tryout.
By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money - and then we wouldn’t need to have this difficult conversation.
With all that said, I must say you’re going about it the right way.Classic 'pump and dump'. I hope this is helpful, and if you want toenter into some sort of lease, please let me know'.
Reader Comment:
1. If she piles on the weight, it's likely to be 'plump and dump!'
2. 'The Investment Banker's response is correct if you see the golddigger as providing only companionship, looks and sophistication.
However, some Investment Bankers may wish to have offspring carryingtheir genes into the next generation. This is a long-term contract, andyou have to 'buy and hold' rather than 'lease'. Therefore this 25year-old beauty should change her sales pitch to: 'I'll give you nicechildren AND I'll let you do whatever else you want on the side as longas you're discreet'.
3. 'I hate to say it but, in the current environment, this Master ofthe Universe should ship her in asap. Then at least he'll have a niceshoulder to cry on when he gets canned. We're ALL depreciating assetsthese days. At least this young lady has some gumption as well as thosespectacular good looks and style to fall back on'.
4. Response to investment banker:
'Ah! But I am an depreciating asset all right (for that matter, you aretoo - but your cash flow stream more than overcompensates for thetoxicity of the future tummy expansion, and contraction of the hair).But the depreciating asset is a convertible one with two embeddedoptions:
The first option is for conversion to a wife, preferably before the daythat the hair / tummy factor becomes less than positive and cashflowbenefits become more important. If you do not take up thatwife-conversion option, then the expanding gut and thinning hair willrequire a constantly and exponentially increasing stream of investedearnings to attract young chicks.
The second option is that you have a put option on a baby (which ispreferably contingent on the first option being exercised), safe in theknowledge that good genes will be passed on. You have to admit, themain reason why you investment bankers are so attractive is because youcan make money. However, we have established information that thosemoney-making genes do not travel very well. My good looks will probablybe passed on though.
So, for an upfront investment in this depreciating asset will, in the long run, make your overall yield curve positive.
(Source - The Daily Salty)
Rob Campbell
J.P.Morgan
Diversified Industrials Investment Banking
277 Park Avenue , 16/F, New York, NY 10172
Phoebe 2007-10-16 03:53 PM
雖然好刻溥,但係好好笑